Andrea you are a monkey, (but not descended from one of course)

My nom de plume, Max, has decided to strike up a correspondence with Andrea Lafferty of the Traditional Values Coalition. I'm hoping she writes back -

Dear Andrea,

I have just found your website after seeing your group mentioned in an article about those Godless wimps in congress somehow voting against defending marriage. I am so mad, I haven't been this mad since I saw the report on the news about the 14 million mexicans that you and I have to pay for. I would like to send the homosexuals and the mexicans packing back to Mexico so they can do whatever Godless perversions they want and answer for it when they try to get past Saint Peter, (like THAT will ever happen). I just don't get it with this pandering to the gay elite. Why I was going to go see Superman but I read that HollyWEIRD has decided he has to be gay too. What blasphemy, what happened to the Man of Steel? Now he is the Man of Pink Flowers!

Are we not allowed to have any right thinking values in our entertainment? My son was watching some trash called "Project Runway" the other night until I took care of that!!! He told me he wants to be a fashion designer like some pervert on there named Santino, (guess what HE is?),of all things! Lord help me and a prayer from you would certainly be appreciated.

I liked the Homosexual Urban Legends section of your website. I sent a link to my ex-wife, (don't get me started please!!!!), and her reply was certainly not fit for sharing. Why I ever married that woman I don't know but I pray for her even though it's hard. I do struggle, she got Poison Ivy all over her last year and I laughed which is not the Christian thing to do but it was so hard not to. I pray for her, I do, even though I really do hate her most of the time. Did you ever see the movie Urban Legend? It was supposed to be scary but it's not as scary as watching two perverts of the same sex blaspheming a marriage altar, AM I RIGHT!?!??!?!

I was wondering where you attend services. I go to a church in Annandale but there has been an influx of mexicans lately and I just don't like it. Some of them don't even believe Jesus was white! Can you believe that? I ask them, "Have you seen the painting of the Last Supper??!!?!?!" but they don't answer me. It's like. "HELLO DON'T YOU PEOPLE UNDERSTAND THE BIBLE ANY BETTER THAN A BORDER CROSSING!?!?!?!?" LOL!!!

Is that your father in the pictures on your website? He is a handsome man (but I don't want to marry him LOL!!!) and I have to say you are quite fetching. If you would like to meet for coffee or a drink after or before church someday I would love to talk to you about everything. You are a great person to talk to I can tell! So please write me back and let me know where you worship. I will be here writing letters to my Congressman and demanding why he lets perverts like Barney Frank call the shots in our Congress!

Peace through Jesus,

Max