Castor Oil...sickeningly good

Friday, December 10, 2004

Bro Nation is wearing black (so what else is new?)

I feel bad for Bro nation.

I mean, it’s almost uncanny that I invent the Bros and then one of the demi-Bros get murdered by a psychopathic Bro underling. That is a totally non-Bro maneuver and he will get docked Bro points upon arrival at the galvanized steel gates of Bro Heaven. Saint FUCKING Pete will undoubtedly bring some shit down on that Bro hater.

It’s a tragedy and all but if you peruse message boards it’s hard not to find the Bro posts a tad ridiculous to the point of entertainment. There are Bro candlelight vigils and Bro poems abounding and Bro benefit concerts and tribute albums in the works.

Not that I knew Dimebag Darrell but I would have to think that he would want the Bros to be a little bit more hardcore about this whole thing. The guy wrote the riff to “Cowboys From Hell”! He named himself DIMEBAG!!!!!!!

Seriously, Bro nation you need to take a look in the mirror at your misshapen tear-stained heads and think to yourself, “is this what Dime would have expected of me?” Jut ponder, in a similar circumstance, “WHAT WOULD DIMEBAG DO?”

I doubt he would sit in a parking lot playing Kumbiya and leaving stuffed animals in the rain. He would have punched a hole in the wall and gone to rock the fuck out.



Post a Comment

<< Home